Spoof story about supermarket’s ‘new door policy’ to keep riffraff out

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Bouncers have been placed on the door at Leighton’s Waitrose to refuse entry to shoppers earning less than £25,000 a year, a parody ‘news’ article has claimed.

Spoof website Evening Harold alleged that the upmarket supermarket chain had chosen the town to pilot the scheme “to ensure that only the right sort of person shops there.”

According to fictional Waitrose marketing director Rupert Thomas: “The Leighton Buzzard trial has only been running for two weeks but 
we have already seen great results with in-store riffraff down by over half and a better class of shopper taking their place.”

‘Thomas’ adds that plumbers and builders earning over £25k were also barred as “they might start touching the fruit and veg with oily hands or something”.

In a twist of a fate the article states that the bouncers themselves earn less than £25k and are therefore unable to enter the store, instead they are forced to use a public toilet over the road for rest breaks.

A spokesman for Waitrose was unavailable for comment before the LBO went to press.