A Linslade woman thought she'd had the last laugh when a delivery box she'd filled with dog poo in the hope of teaching a parcel thief a lesson vanished - only to find out that her cheeky teenage daughter had hidden it for a trick!
Lorraine Bateman, 49, was left angry when a box of wine she had left out to be collected was stolen by a faux delivery driver in a high-vis jacket.
Determined to take revenge, she filled an Amazon box with dog poo and a rude note in the hope that he would return - and she thought her plan had succeeded, only to later discover that her daughter, "who has the same sense of humour", had hidden the smelly parcel for a laugh.
Huge fire destroys narrow boat on Grand Union Canal in Heath and Reach
No hosepipe ban in Leighton Buzzard says Anglian Water as area moves into drought
Changes to Schools for the Future programme will impact Shefford and Stotfold cluster and Aspley Guise
Cortney Batchelor jailed for four years over '˜one punch' fatal attack
Talented Linslade school pupil has work displayed in Royal Academy of Arts
Lorraine told the LBO: "I was just so angry and so annoyed that the wine had been taken, so the next morning I thought, I'll leave a box filled with dog poo out there!
"I've got two big dogs, so I was running around, shoving their mess into a shoe trainer box, and then put it inside an Amazon box.
"It was left outside all day Tuesday, and then on Wednesday I drove up to the drive and said 'It's gone, it's gone it's gone!'"
She laughed: "I now know that my daughter had snuck it down by the side of the garage, chuckling away to herself.
"She was cracking up when she saw what I was doing, and thought it would be brilliant to see my reaction if it was taken."
Lorraine had received a subscription of wine that she didn't want, so had left that box outside on Monday (December 13) for it to be collected by the company, Laithwaite's.
Her daughter saw a man in a high vis jacket come and take the wine, so Lorraine was puzzled to receive a call from Laithwaite's later that afternoon to say they were at the door, and where was the parcel? It then became clear that it had been stolen.
Lorraine says she "doesn't blame" Laithwaite's at all, rather it wasn't a good idea to leave the parcel alone on the doorstep.
However, she told the LBO: "I normally work from home, but I was with my family, trying to organise my mum's funeral during Covid; I was running round and didn't have much time.
"I think it's a despicable thing to do. Some people have no morals, they just go out and take things from hardworking people."
Lorraine is advising people not to leave packages outside if you are away and they need collecting. Instead, arrange for a neighbour to look after it.
She added: "We're going to get a Ring Camera now!"
Sadly, Lorraine’s mother, Maureen Hall, aged 80, lost her battle with dementia on Saturday, December 11.
Lorraine said: "If this story has made you smile - or at least made you more aware of security for your parcels - and you wish to donate to Dementia UK, this would be gratefully appreciated."